Quotes about Understanding

The real beginning of influence comes as others sense you are being influenced by them—when they feel understood by you—that you have listened deeply and sincerely, and that you are open. But most people are too vulnerable emotionally to listen deeply—to suspend their agenda long enough to focus on understanding before they communicate their own ideas.

As clearly and objectively as we think we see things, we begin to realize that others see them differently from their own apparently equally clear and objective point of view. "Where we stand depends on where we sit.

The more people are into quick fixes and focus on the acute problems and pain, the more that very approach contributes to the underlying chronic condition. The way we see the problem is the problem.

Two people can see the same thing, disagree, and yet both be right. It's not logical; it's psychological.

Principle of making what is important to the other person as important to you as the other person is to you.

Just listen and seek to understand.

To relate effectively with a wife, a husband, children, friends, or working associates, we must learn to listen. And this requires emotional strength. Listening involves patience, openness, and the desire to understand—highly developed qualities of character. It's so much easier to operate from a low emotional level and to give high-level advice.

The fundamental problem has nothing to do with your behavior or your attitude. It has everything to do with having a wrong map.

Remember, to learn and not to do is really not to learn. To know and not to do is really not to know.

Principles are the territory. Values are maps. When we value correct principles, we have truth—a knowledge of things as they are.

Go out with your spouse on a regular basis. Have dinner or do something together you both enjoy. Listen to each other; seek to understand.

We know and accept this fact or principle of process in the area of physical things, but to understand it in emotional areas, in human relations, and even in the area of personal character is less common and more difficult. And